Self Development

‘Homework’

“To thine own self be true”

We know that if people are treated badly then harmful consequences tend to result. We also know that the only person that can live our lives is ourselves, nobody can do it for us. Therefore it naturally follows that I must treat myself well otherwise harmful consequences will result. The rationale for this kind of self-awareness and valuing is easy to grasp – to do otherwise would be self-neglect.   While this reasoning might make absolute sense, this message is often absent from our upbringing.  The notion of compassion, kindness, nurturing and love are often taught as outward expressions, ways to treat others. Indeed, traditionally, the idea of self-nurturing can be judged as being selfish, ego-centred, somehow belonging to a narcissistic paradigm.

However, when put into the context of one’s life, ‘me’ not only includes myself but my partner, friends, beliefs, in short, all that matters to me. Then, self-nurture becomes something that includes all I care about and it can never be self-centred. Rather it is self-inclusive. A practical analogy is the example of the safety information given out when flying, when the flight attendant instructs you first to put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else with theirs – without self-care you can’t help others, certainly not effectively. 

So this page is about you taking good care of the person you are responsible for – You.

It starts with valuing yourself.

if I am the longest relationship

of my life

isn’t it time to

nurture intimacy

and love

with the person

I lie in bed with each night –

acceptance

rupi kaur, ‘the sun and her flowers’

Listen to the lyrics of this song and believe the words: it is about you.

Positive-Self-Regard also requires healthy physical attention. I believe that you will find the following very helpful:

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